Thursday, March 3, 2011

Northwest Corruption!


So today my coworker laughed at me because of how I ordered my coffee at Starbucks today. When I asked him what was so funny, he asked me if I remembered the story I told him about trying to get a cup of coffee at an espresso stand.
You see, I moved here to Washington from New Jersey about 12 years ago (12 years! Holy crap!!). At the time in NJ, there were no espresso stands and I never even heard of a Starbucks. The only people that drank espressos were snobs or Italians. If you wanted coffee, you’d go to Dunkin’ Donuts. I always got mine with cream and sugar, so you would ask for it light and sweet. One morning on the way to work, I got curious about all the coffee stands, so I pulled up to one and simply asked, “Can I get a coffee, light and sweet?” The barista looks down at me with a disgusted look on her face, hand at her hip with almost a valley girl like voice and says, “Ugh, We don’t have just coffee.” I was a little bit confused at this point. I look back at her and say in a similar tone, “Um, OK. What do you have that tastes like coffee?” She rolls her eyes, looks away from me, smacks her tongue against the roof of her mouth and says to me, “Well, we have an Americano.” At this point I’m seriously annoyed. “OK then, give me an Americano light and sweet.” She looks back at me with that same disgusted look and asks me, “What’s ‘light and sweet’ mean?” I looked at her like she must be the biggest idiot in the world and reply, “…umm…with cream and sugar.” I’m about to just leave when I see her bring out the coffee. “That’s gonna be $2.50,” as she hands me the coffee. “What?! For coffee!!” Very quickly she replies, “It’s a Americano.” It took about 5 years and a promise of a free coffee from a friend for me to try an espresso place after that.
Alright back to the other story. Here is my order when the barista asked me what I wanted at Starbucks, Grande White Chocolate Mocha with Soy, No whip, No foam, and extra hot. I had to laugh when my coworker pointed that out to me. As you can see, the Northwest has corrupted me.